A few times in the past I have spoken here about Michael and haircuts. If you are an autism parent you already know how difficult and utterly exhausting getting your child’s hair cut can be. His first cut was a horrible experience, for us both. After that first cut, we were both ruined for a while. I decided I would start cutting it myself. He still cried. It was still exhausting, and it still took the rest of the day for him to recuperate….every. single. time.

Over time things got better with me cutting, but I am no barber. It always looked okay, but it definitely could have used professional help. One day driving through town, I noticed a barber shop I had never seen before. I took David first. I met Freddy. He did a really good job, and David was comfortable. I thought for a bit and decided I would TRY to take Michael. I expected to walk out in tears. When we got there, I explained that Michael was autistic and really didn’t like cuts from anyone. Freddy talked to him. He joked with him, and made him comfortable. I was in shock. We have always gone back. Michael actually asks to go back.

So when we decided we were going to move, it hit me. I would have to find a new barber for Michael. The thought turned my stomach. The level of trust he has built with Freddy is not something that comes easily. Now we would have to start from square one.  Last time I got Michael’s cut I jokingly (but seriously too) said that if I had unlimited funds I would fly Freddy back and forth just to cut Michael’s hair. Freddy and I are friends on Facebook, and he saw that post.

Well, this weekend I went to get Michael’s hair cut. As we were getting ready to leave, Freddy asked when we would be moving. I told him, in the the beginning of July.

He said to me…..ready…..I hope you are sitting….

He said to me, “My wife and I talked. We will go down to Virginia before the school year starts, so I can cut Michael’s hair.”

I thought I was hearing things. I must have looked like a deer in the headlights and I obviously thought that he was joking. As a matter of fact, I must have asked six or seven times if he was. He was NOT. He was dead serious. He also was not already planning to go to Virginia. The purpose of his trip, from New Jersey to Virginia, would be to cut Michael’s hair.

How do you thank someone for a gift like that? How do you make them understand just how much the gesture means? I still am not sure.
A gift certificate?
A kidney, maybe?

For now, this post is my thanks to you Freddy. You have no idea what that means to me…what it will mean to Michael. You have shown a level of kindness that I don’t know I could ever repay you for.



Both of those pictures were taken after Michael’s very first visit to Freddy’s


Comments on: "Can I offer you a kidney?" (8)

  1. Shari Nessine said:

    I took my son there yesterday for the first time. He has Aspbergers and sensory issues and cutting his hair has always been a horrible experience for both of us. Mike cut his hair and without any issue! I’m thrilled! I will definitely recommend Bladez! They rock!

  2. I so LOVE the Freddy’s of the world. Truly special people.

    PS…I’d give a lung. But maybe that’s just me. 😉

  3. I was not surprised by this story. I worked for years with Freddy in Hackensack NJ. He was always Sweet, Kind, helpful and smiling.has a beautiful family. I missed him when he moved away,but was so excited and happy that he started his own business and is a Huge Success. I hear that people wait for hours for him to design a haircut for them. He was always the Artist. and graduated from Pumpkin Heads to Human Ones. God Bless YOU Freddy. when I come back from Florida I hope I can take my Grandson in to see you!!

  4. Sounds like this man has a calling.. he should teach other Barbers how to work with Sensory kids or travel the country finding places that can.. God Bless him

  5. […] A version of this post originally appeared on This Ausome Family. […]

  6. […] who blogged about her experience, feels touched that someone would offer such a […]

  7. Rachell said:

    I have a son, now 4 years old who was always terrified of getting his hair cut. For a while, I ised to cut his hair but like you, that would stress us out too. I totally understand this story and reading this, I’m so relieved to see we weren’t the only ones who experienced something like this. My son was always so sensitive to noise and a lot of our friends and family never understood. We searched everywhere, I watched YouTube videos to learn how to cut boys hair but we found a ‘Freddy’ at Iconic Barbershop in Glen Rock, NJ. He came to our home the first time he cut my sons hair to meet him and make things a little easier and now 8 months later he visits his shop, sits in the chair all by himself and even enjoys getting a cut and looking handsome afterwards. We came into contact with a lot of people who rolled their eyes, were impatient and not understanding at all. A little boy with fears like this is a hard thing to deal with unless you know first hand how afraid they really do get. I love your story and I’m so glad that there are still people in the world like this. Thank you so much for sharing this…

  8. God bless Freddy for treating your son with respect and giving him the kindness he deserves. Bravo Freddy!

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